So what’s your STORY? We all have a story we tell about ourselves, how we came to be the way we are, how our life has ended up looking like it does.
We also BELIEVE our stories. After all, we lived them! From our perspective, this story is ABSOLUTELY true. We remember it! We KNOW this is how it all came about.
And yet – consider this: there is a phenomenon known as the Rashomon Effect, named after Akira Kurosawa‘s 1950 film Rashomon, in which a murder is described in four mutually contradictory ways by its four witnesses.
Scholars have studied this phenomenon and agree that there are many factors that influence people to tell supposed “facts” differently – there are differences in perspectives or points of view on the matter. There are differences due to memory and recollection, not just perception. There are differences because of subjectivity / objectivity, and differences due to social pressures, and inner pressures such as desire for closure, and more.
With all of these chances for differing interpretations, it’s no wonder that Marianne Williamson said “Your childhood didn’t happen the way you think it did anyway!”
The stories we tell about ourselves are not just about our childhood, they’re also about our current situations. As many times as I’ve heard clients say “There aren’t any good partners left out there at my age!” I’ve also heard stories about a true soulmate couple finding each other late in life against all odds.
The stories we tell ourselves are important, because repetition ingrains certain neural pathways in our brain, which cause our unconscious mind to repeat patterns that follow our stories.
To shift your life, begin noticing what story you’re telling about yourself and your relationships. Then ask yourself what story you would PREFER to tell about yourself?
Writing out a new story is very powerful, because the act of writing fires new neural pathways into your brain. The beauty of it is that you don’t have to figure out how you’re going to make your new story come true! It’s enough to KNOW what you prefer your story to be, and to write it out and RELISH it.
Repeating the new story over and over to yourself, feeling yourself absolutely LOVING this new version of your life, sends the right message to your unconscious mind to start figuring out how to bring you new results instead of the same old results you were getting.
So next time you hear yourself telling a story about your life, ask yourself if that’s the way you want it to be. If not, write yourself a new story, repeat it over and over to yourself, and watch what happens!
Let me know the results you get by posting in the comments below, or on my Facebook page here. Wishing you a new story and a new life!